Good morning, folks.

While I abhor Paris Hilton and her vapid, pointless celebrity as much as the next person, she has actually succeeded today in making legitimate news. Not “Paris is drunk driving” news. Not “Paris made a sex tape” news.

No, Paris got released from jail because of an “unspecified medical condition”.

Various reports originally circulated that she had a rash; then it appreared jail food didn’t agree with her… and now it seems she was simply not enjoying her stay. Interestingly enough, this is not the news that I’m talking about.

No, I’m talking about this quadriplegic man who, in 2004, died in jail due to a different “medical condition”… namely that his jailors failed to provide him with a ventilator.

Different jails, different dates, different people - but the fact is, there is a double standard here that cannot be ignored. With talks of Scooter Libby being pardoned (patsy though he may be) I think it’s fairly safe to say that this is incontrovertible proof:

You can literally be rich enough - or powerful enough - to be above the law.

I’d like to take a moment to voice my complete and utter hatred of USMLE forums. I invariably stumble across these when Googling anything Boards related, and I swear half the people type like they’re 13:

OMG I h8 studyin soooo much,,,,, jusst wannaa go watch a movie! What do u all think the bets movies r ??? LOL I wanna see JoNnY DePp in Pirates.

PS whuts the gene defect in Von Recklinghausen’s?

And then, I realize: nope, they’re all medical students. I can see future charts looming…

Patient: Steve Johnson (OmG he is sooo dreamy)
Age: 25
Sex: Yes please! LOLZ!!!!
 

In other news†, researchers at the University of Nottingham find that mild hookworm infections may prevent asthma, Crohn’s, and other atopic disease.

Their hypothesis? Our bodies are so accustomed to invading parasites that not being infected may cause the errant eosinophils to seek out other targets… like a pack of teenage boys with nothing better to do.

†from 2001, but still interesting

I have the distinct feeling that I’m not getting anywhere studying for the boards. Now that I’ve gotten through all of First Aid once, what I don’t know is the stuff I never wanted to study the first time around.

What this means is that I sit around reinforcing the material that I already know and skipping the stuff I don’t. Unfortunately I just don’t have the mental fortitude to force myself to memorize a lot of shit I don’t like… which is really all that’s left to do.

EDIT: I just realized I haven’t done a few sections, which’ll keep me going for at least another day and a half. But after that, I’ve still got 2 weeks until the exam.

Interesting Fact #1

People suffering from Celiac Sprue used to be barred from the Catholic priesthood. Don’t believe me? A priest taking communion is an integral part of Catholic mass - not only for their own salvation but for that of the congregation.

Unfortunately, since the communion wafer must be made from wheat (according to Roman Catholic doctrine), and there is no leeway for use of rice wafers, the Congregation barred people suffering from Celiac sprue from the priesthood, as they could not complete the sacrament. Luckily, through the miracles† of modern science, a new ultra-low-gluten wafer is available and the ban on Celiac Priests is lifted.

Interesting Fact #2

Ever wondered where the name Maalox came from? The most common antacids are made from Magnesium, Aluminum, or Calcium. Maalox is a combination of Magnesium Hydroxide and Aluminum HydrOxide. MaAlOx.

For all you USMLE studiers out there, this combination allows for regular bowel habits by combining the diarrhea-producing Magnesium antacids with the constipating Aluminum ones.

†irony?