Agraphia Medical Tragicomedy


Question Time

Our class is in the middle of a war over questions. Not just "what should I study tonight?" or "why am I so tired all the time?". I mean questions that are asked, in class, by a select few people that monopolize the time. Tuesday was by far and away the worst this whole year, so one of our classmates took it upon himself to send an email out. The boyfriend of Person#1 (see below) sent a reply back. The rest is history. I'll give a quick synopsis... anonymously.

(Person #1) Asks at least 3 questions in any given class period. Asked 11 questions in 1 hour, 40 minutes on Tuesday. It was all I could do not to hurl my notes at her. Questions are prefaced by a minute-long preamble on why she is asking the question, including a reference to the specific page in the notes. Also provides a minute-long cooldown statement as to what she thinks of the answer after it has been given.
Time wasted per day: ~10 minutes of her own voice plus however long it takes for the prof to wade through the morass. Profs have started cutting her off to try to get through the material in a timely fashion. It should be duly noted that when asked by another student to "repeat the question", lecturers have been unable to... twice.

(Person #2) Finds a way to say at least one thing every day. Just starts speaking and eventually gets around to a point where the pitch of her voice rises and she stops. I think this is supposed to signal that she's just asked a question. Sits in the back and talks quietly enough that you'd have trouble hearing her if you were face-to-face. Clearly doesn't care if the question is answered, just wants to be heard. Often simply asks the lecturer to repeat the last 5 minutes of what they just said.
Time wasted per day: only ~2 minutes... but 2 minutes, every day. And just to hear herself speak. Which we can barely hear. It kills me.

(Person #3) I love her to death but I think it's possible she's actually a mute in disguise.
Time wasted per day: none. I actually like her questions, I just can't hear what they are.

(Person #4) Also a great person, but has decided that she speaks for the class and enjoys pointing out trivia for the benefit of everyone else.
Time wasted per day: fluctuates. frankly, "wasted" might be the wrong word, since her asides are really pretty fun.

Anyhow. On tuesday our Physiology prof actually started rationing question time, since he was worried he wouldn't be able to get through all the material. So, after class, an email got sent out to the entire class listserv by this guy Chirag, asking everyone to keep questions to a minimum. He gets more than 15 emails in response supporting what he has to say... but only to him. The next listserv-wide email is from person #1's boyfriend, basically calling Chirag out for targeting a few individuals and claiming he should have approached them one-on-one first.

Flame war commences. We're now at email #9 and the anti-question people have clocked in the last 2 blows. I'm pretty excited to see what happens next.

I'm thinking of grabbing a bowl of popcorn and watching this thing erupt. I only wish people would stop changing the subject line of the email so that Gmail could collate them all and I could see everything in its dramatic, hateful glory.

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